disposing the evidence

Tonight's topic of conversation in the kitchen:

If you had to flush a dead body down the toilet, and you decided to chop up the dead body in your blender, how many blenders full would there be before you pulverized the entire body?

ps - we're definitely talking about Wendy's blender here. There's no way I'd allow meat of any kind in my blender!

hot update

What is up with people on the internet?

HOT or NOT 6.4 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 97 votes Rate me!

Apparently a hungover, unshaven, unwashed dude in a bathrobe is hotter than 60% of the men on hotornot.com. In fact, my "control" picture has only garnered an 8/10 (although it has gone up as high as 9.5 on occasion, and as low as 7.7, which makes me think the whole voting system is as meaningless as American democracy)

Kind of makes you think. If I'm hotter than 60% of men when I look like shit, and hotter than 78% of men when I'm rocking out, is it really worth it to make an effort to look presentable?

I'm going to bed. And I'm not going to comb my hair when I get up.

Batter Up

I used to be one of those people who absolutely hated it when a car drives by with the stereo cranked. Usually they're playing some sort of lame top 40 hip hop. It sounds completely ass, and it makes the driver of said vehicle look like a complete tool.

Well I'm a changed man. The other night after dropping Wendy off (I'll spare her the embarrassment of telling all you all where she was going for the evening) her mixed tape of hip hop was still in the deck. And did I ever get the urge to cruise down Barrington in that little Acura, the music blasting, my elbow on the window sill, and my head bobbing up and down to the music. I was feeling it. And now I get it. I understand why you need to drive around with the music so loud that it feels like your butt is getting a massage. It makes you the coolest man ever!

Try it sometime. I suggest you pick a real groovy song, the type of song where you know the girls in the video are scantily clad, and gyrating to the beat. Nelly's a good choice. Also, bring the seat really far forward (or just don't adjust it after Wendy was driving), because that way you feel like a BIG MAN. Too big for this car, baby! All that's left to do is look out the side window, and nod to people on the sidewalk. Das right, foo. My wheels they be all 'dat, and my tunes be mad pimp. Peace out, wiggaz.

Am I Hot, or Not?

The answer to this and many of life's other baffling questions can now be found on the internet. Slacks and her brother are addicted to HotOrNot, an awful website that allows you to make snap judgements on whether someone is attractive or ugly, based on one lousy digital photo. So I had to join in on the fun. Naturally, I picked the most unflattering picture of myself that I could find. It was taken this past Hallowe'en at the NSCAD dance. I was dressed as "Your Hungover Dad":



And now, you too get to rate me! woohoo!

HOT or NOT 6.1 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 26 votes Rate me!

no shame

What are you two laughing at?

Shut up.

No need to get Snipey

I spent part of my day spotting snipers. Good times, good times. Oh, and some guy came to town.